Getting To Know You

It’s Back to School time again. Just look at all the newspaper advertisements for school sales that send parents to the malls to shop for children’s clothes and the other necessary school supplies. It’s exciting; it’s expensive. It’s a time to examine how we use our resources. It’s a time to evaluate our educational focus and philosophy.

It’s the one time a year when parents and teachers have the unique opportunity to shape a child’s life-time view of the value of education. It’s the one time a year when we revisit what we are doing and why we are doing it. And just what are we doing?

We hope the long term goal here is to help young children approach the educational system with excitement and eager anticipation. Learning to negotiate a complex social system, like school, is a challenge. For the student it isn’t all fun and games or all nice friends. It can be a frightening experience. You can “mess up” if you don’t instantly know all the rules or you can be lucky and have a bully sitting next to you in class. The anxious kindergarten student may need a hand to hold onto as she approaches the new classroom. Next year’s approach to opening day may be different or it may be the same. Moving into a classroom, having to share space, time and attention with another 20 students, and meeting another authority figure known as the teacher is a lot to be responsible for. As the commercial says, life can come at you fast. All these learning situations are opportunities that we don’t want to miss. We want to be able to predict most of them and we want to smooth the pathway for young learners.

A helpful hand, a facial tissue to wipe away a tear, a cheerful smile, and a welcoming room that says, “I was expecting you.” will make a world of difference with the child. It also makes all the difference to the parent.

Just as the child is adjusting to the new schedule and being away from home and parent, the parent will be adjusting to the new situation as well. When we take a child to school, we are also taking ourselves (our inner child) to school. Many parents remark how surprised they are when their own feelings on their first day of school simply bubble up when they see their child go off to school. Often the way we felt going to school on that first day colors how we feel about our child’s first day. Being aware of this helps us guide our children properly rather than impose our own feelings or fears upon them.

One of the most important things to remember during this time is to be patient. New relationships are not built in a day, a week, or a month. Once a child has a good understanding of the building, the teacher, the classroom rules, and made a friend, everything falls into place. Then the nightly support of helping with homework can begin.